i wanna live...

21st December dated as the day when the world will end..but doom has already fallen on us..

if i am a girl it does not mean i can't survive..
if i am a girl it does not mean i can't breathe..
people worship me as goddess on one side...
and abuse me like trash on other side..
i am a mother..i give birth to you..
and u take life away from me..
i live my whole life for u..and u steal every moment of my life in just few fraction of seconds..
i m a friend..i make u smile..make u feel comfortable around me..wipe your tears.. 
and u make me loose my smile..u give me gift of tears...
i m a wife..i bind two families together with bond of love, care and respect..
and u shatter every bond and rip me apart..
i m a sister who prays for her brother long life ... tie the bond of love on his hand and feel secure and protected..
and u broke all my expectations and force me to stay my whole life in fear... 
i m a daughter..give you small small moments which you cherish for your lifetime..trust you , you will never let anything happen to me..
and u broke my trust.. wipe off all those memories and fill my mind with memories of pain and disgust ...
i m a girl not a thing to be used..
not a toy to be played with..
you just cant use me n throw..
i too want love , protection and respect..
i m not inferior to you...
stop being brutal.. i too have a life..
i m not a prey to be fed upon..
i too wanna live...

kyun..

Teri ikcha anusar waqt chalta h... 
Teri ikcha anusar insaan jeeta h marta h... 
Srishti ka har niyam har kanoon tune banaya h., 
Kan kan me tu basta h... 
Phir bhi insaan kyu din raat sisakta h... 
Kyu apni kismat ko rota h.. 
Agar har cheez teri ikcha anusar h toh kyu koi bada h kyu koi chota... 
Kyu koi mehlo me rehta h aur kyu koi dar dar bhatakta h... 
Kyu ksi ki har khawish puri krta h tu aur kyu koi khwash krne se bhi darta h... 
Kyu kisi ki jholi bhar dta h tu aur kyu kisi ko jholi h dena bhul jata h... 
Kyu kch bacho ki zindgi me h sb kch aur kyu kch ko lakdiyo ke sahare zindgi jeeni pdti h... 
Kyu kch logo ki duniya me rang bhar diye tune aur kyu kch ki ankho ke samne bas andhera h... 
Kyu kuch ki duniya me khushi h aur kyu kch ghum me doobe hue h... 
Agar sabki kismat likhta h tu, 
Toh kyu ksi ki zindgi me sab kch bhar deta h aur kyu kisi se sb kch cheen leta h tu....

phir..

Naa jane kaha waqt le jay hume..
ye wqt na jaane beet ke ayga ya nahi..
door tanha raah par sath na chodna.. khud ko akela pau na kabhi..
har pal sikhata hai kuch phir beet jata hai waqt..
jo galtiya ki na dohrau unhe kabhi..
logo ki bheed me fir khud ko akela pau na kabhi..
mushkil se milte hai log jo zindgi jeena sikhate hai..bahut muddat ke baad milte hai kuch jo zindgi ban jate hai..
andheri raato me na khud ko khona hai phir..kahi khamoshi me khud ko akela pau na fir..
aasu dene wale milte hai bahut..unhe pochne wale milte hai kam..
dukh dene wale hai bahut..usme sth rehne wale hai kam..
phir baarish ki bundo mein rone lag jau na kabhi..
fir akeli padh jau na kahi..
beeta waqt kabhi laut k aye ya nahi..
sunsan sadko pe kabhi khud ko akela phir na pau..
kahi khamoshi me ghum na ho jau....

sister..

Sister a best friend to her brother or sister...who protects them from every problems of life..she stand in front of them to take every trouble on her..she guides them ..share their talks.. and always have a solution to each and every query of theirs.. she's the only person in our whole life with whom we can share our entire lives.. from our every little stupid talk to our most sensible one she is the only one who pays attention to each of our conversation..
she heels our broken heart..make us strong..wipe our tears..n can do anything to see us smile .. whenever we are sad she makes our three favorite dishes pasta macaroni maggie just to cheer us up.. she cries wen we cry n smiles wen we smile..wakes up whole night just to see us sleep comfortably when we are not well..she cooks for us when we study late night..stay awake with us so we can get a company...whenever we are scared she holds our hand tight and hug us to make us feel secure..she is one in million...she treats us like her own children.. she love us like a mum dad.. she shares like a best friend..she scolds like teacher..she protects like a brother..she is a guardian a protector a lover and a fighter..shes my angel shes my sister.........

peopl thnk..

Ppl thnk i hav chngd..
Ppl thnk i prtnd..
Ppl thnk my feelngz r fake..
Ppl thnk m nt d same...
Ppl thnk i ovr react..
Ppl thnk i m a mess.,
ppl thnk i m a kid.,
ppl thnk i m aggrsve..
Ppl thnk i shuld b a littl more mature,,
ppl thnk i should b littl lyk dem,.
Ppl thnk i shuld b nt me,.
Ppl thnk dey cn rule ova me..
Ppl thnk dey cn cntrl me..
Ppl thnk m out of cntrl..
Ppl thnk i m stupd..
Ppl thnk m kidish..
Ppl thnk i have chngd
ppl thnk m nt d same...
Dunt knw i m wrng or wat ppl thnk is wrng.
I juz knw..
Changes cnt b made in a dae in a month or in a year..changes happen wen v want dem to hppn...

changes...

enrything has changed bit by bit..nthng is d same..
missng hm ..missng few frndz...dunt knw wat to do juz wanna cry , shout n run..
wid him ol her luck has gone...
she stil miss hm rembr him..
shez afraid of herslf..afraid of him..
she finally lost wat she olwaz treasured...
he ruled her heart, he was her lyf..
her soul used to reside in him..
ol d dreams woven by them..
ol d promises made by him..
evrythn shattered lyk broken pieces of mirror.. which cnt b mend or fixed..
nw itz nt dem..itz juz him..itz juz her..
evrythng changed for her..
wsh she culd chnge herslf..
wsh she culd chnge her love...

memories.....

d nite sky..
d droplets of rain..
d air surrounding her..
reminds her nothing juz him..
nite sky fillin her lonliness..
droplets of rain washing away her tears..
air moving around her hugging and going..
evrythng lost evrythng broken..
ol dreams shattered..
and her heart left broken..
nothng can b perfct nthng can b fixed..
a smile lost in million of tears...
a face lost in midst of crowd..
nthng was real, evrythn was juz a fantasy..
d feelings so strng finally drained..
d unbreakable bond fnally broke...
a girl was left weeping dae in n dae out..
culdnt belve ds culd eva happen..
finally a fake world wd fake smyl was nly left..
evrythn seemed dead..
her life came 2 a standstil..
her life became a lie...
happiness left her world ...
her lyf was filled wd sorrows n sobs...
n she finally ended up cryn..
wish ol his lies were true..
evrythng changed fr her..
her lyf chnged..
ppl in her lyf chnged..
ppl she was olwaz dependent on, lft her broken crying..
ol her tears went in vain..
no1 heard her..
d meaning of lov changed ...
n finally she chnged...
wish she culd earse evrythn..
wsh she culd earse her thougts haunted by him..
wsh she culd escpe her love...

a girl...

a little girl trustd evry1..evryone whu cme in her lyf...unknwn became known,.few came closer and few came evn more closer..she trustd evry1 had full faith in ech and evry one she came across.. world seemed beautifl to her ..
untl d dae she faced d real world...d world of fantasy she was livin in came to an end..she was lost in d midst of crowd..,evry1 broke her bit by bit..hr lyf was shatterd..she cried she begged..no1 heard her she was left all alone..d ppl she trustd broke her trust..d ppl she believed in lft hr..d one she loved broke her heart ..she stood all alone cryng.. askng fr help..askng for sumone to save hr frm dis darkness from ds lonely lyf.. bt her voice was unheard..ppl cme n went bt no1 hlpd hr.. she shouted she cried bt no1 came,.she was lost in d depths of sorrows..ol her efforts went in vain... ol her hopes drained.. n d little grl culdnt survive..she culdnt face d reality of lyf..realty of ppl..with ol her broken dreamz n tears in her eyez she finally left d world wd a smile..ol she wantd was sum1 to love..sum1 she culd trust sum1 who will nt break her dreamz..sum1 who wil nt break her heart..